An Honest Conversation: Choosing To Believe In Yourself + Some Life Lessons

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Life can be hard and sometimes leave us feeling like we're not doing enough.

But we don't have to make it even harder on ourselves, which is what I tend to do... so I wanted to talk to you about choosing to believe in yourself, being kind and patient with yourself, and doing the work. 

Self-awareness and personal growth are really important to me, and I hope it's important to you too. And having these honest conversations with you, so here we go...

 

Choose to believe in yourself, because your opinion is the only one that matters.

I consider myself extremely lucky, because so many people around me seem to believe in me, when often, I don’t even believe in myself. There just seems to be a disconnect sometimes, but I know how important it is that I believe in myself too.

The truth is that it won’t matter if everyone else in the world believes in you if you don’t believe in yourself. And yes, I’m speaking from experience.

Because on some days, I feel like emptiness. Like I’m missing something. Like it’s staring me right in the face and I can’t see it. And sometimes, it makes me sad, because I know I could be growing and moving along so much faster if I just believed in myself. Truly and genuinely believed in myself, but if I’m being honest, I’m not 100% there yet. Or even 70%.

I wanted to share this with you because sometimes we know what we have to do or what has to be done (ex. believing in yourself), and yet, we can’t seem to get ourselves “there”.

But also please don’t beat yourself up over it. Know what you need to do and keep working towards it, but don’t make yourself feel bad on top on feeling bad, because it doesn’t lead to anyway good.

Know that things take time and that it’s okay to go at your own pace. Don’t compare your journey to others, because life isn’t a competition. Life shouldn’t be a competition even if that’s what you were taught growing up.

(Related: Give Yourself Some Credit Because You’re Doing Great)

 

 

Give yourself some grace and love, because if you’re like me, you probably need it.

It never hurts to be more compassionate and kind with yourself.

That’s not to say you don’t have to show up or do the work, because you do. You have to do both of those, but you can be kind to yourself at the same time. It’s not an either or scenario, which is something I'm still working on and learning. Often, it feels as if it were on one end of the spectrum or another.

And while you’re at it, take yourself off the mental timeline. Y’know, “I have x months to do this and make it happen” or “This person did this in x months so I have to too”. It’s not a race against anyone else or yourself. Beating yourself up over things like these is going to make you feel worse, so be kind to yourself. Grow, learn, invest in yourself every day but know that where you are is enough. Remember, there's a learning curve / gap involved, and it's not going to happen overnight.

 

Another lesson I’ve learned along the way: Make sure it’s sustainable.

“Overnight success” doesn’t really exist and it doesn’t happen overnight. Would you rather have 15 seconds of fame, or something that’s sustainable that lasts?

The journey isn’t just one linear line going up and up. It goes up, downs, in loops, and sometimes all over the place. You might feel high as a kite on some days while wanting to crawl under the covers on other days. But it’s about showing up consistently regardless of how you feel, because you can’t just skip out 4 days out of the week. It's not a linear process, which sometimes sucks, but sometimes it doesn't.

And when you believe in yourself, like truly and deeply believe in yourself, it becomes so much easier to show up - because you know why you’re showing up and you believe in your dreams. You believe in yourself to make them a reality. You can see, feel, and live the reality even though it hasn’t happened yet.

Choose to believe in yourself so much, so that it doesn’t matter if other people believe in you.

 

So to recap:

1. Choose to believe in yourself. 2. Be kind to yourself and give yourself some grace. 3. Things take time so give yourself that. 4. Make sure it’s sustainable.

Because we can do anything we put our minds to. I truly believe in the saying "It works if you work it." And I think the website, blog, and community is a reflection of that.

If I don't show up, then who else is going to? If you don't show up, who else is going to?

If you don't believe in yourself, why should anyone else?